How much time will the Lord give my father? We do not know. He is still with us. He is strong, but it will be when the Lord decides. We had a nurse practitioner come in yesterday and offer to increase his morphine "to slow his breathing." I was the only one here at the time, and that sounded funny to me. He wasn't breathing overly rapidly, so why would we want to do that? I told her to wait to speak to my wife (a registered nurse) first before changing anything. So later, my wife spoke to her and she was much more blunt with my wife as to the reason: to speed things up (let the reader understand). No! That's not how we do things. It a good caution to us: people often try to make things that are not good sound good.
In situations like these - and I've dealt with them often as a pastor but not so often as a son - we aim always to care, never to kill. The Lord may grant him healing and then we will rejoice in the added time we have received as a gift. Or, the Lord may call him home to his eternal rest and joy. And then we will rejoice in the life promised and now given. But we will wait for the Lord (another good phrase from the psalms!). And even if it takes a long time and is difficult, it is good.
A friend of mine, a former parishioner, and brother pastor Chris Yang and his wife Jenny came to visit Thursday night. My dad supported him through seminary and while he served as a missionary in Asia. They came by to see my dad here a couple of years ago when they were on home service from Asia. It was very nice of them to come by and speak the Word of God to my father and sing to him.
But today, another day of vigil with him . . .
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